Should You Hire a Celebrant or Have a Friend Officiate Your Wedding?
If you're having your wedding in Australia, you've probably pondered whether you can have your Dad as your Celebrant. Or your sister? Maybe even Mrs Procsino, your Grade 3 teacher? You might've thought: should I hire a professional authorised Celebrant, or can I have a friend or family member lead our ceremony instead?
Your best mate might have known you since the first day of high school. Your dad might be the funniest storyteller (or at least he thinks he is). Your sister who's known you since the start.
Sounds pretty nice to have one of them standing up there with you two, right?
The slight issue is that Australian marriage law doesn't allow just anyone to legally solemnise a marriage.
BUT there's another option at your disposal - one that many couples don't know about when they start their wedding planning: a Co-Pilot Ceremony.
Can a friend LEGALLY marry you in Australia?
Nope, they can't... unless your mate is an authorised marriage Celebrant, a recognised religious minister or an authorised registry officer.
Australia doesn't have the same system as the US where someone can jump online, ring some internet people, get ordained online and legally marry their friends.
Your friend - or whoever you choose - can, however, lead many of the ceremonial and memorable parts of your wedding - the vows, the rings, the story, etc - but an authorised person - usually a registered Celebrant - needs to carry out the legal components if you want your ceremony to result in a legally valid Australian marriage.
Who can legally marry a couple in Australia?
Authorised Celebrant
A registered Australian marriage Celebrant who is authorised to solemnise marriages.
Religious minister
A minister of religion from a recognised denomination who is authorised to solemnise marriages.
Registry officer
An authorised officer who can solemnise marriages through the relevant registry.
What does a professional wedding Celebrant actually do?
A professional authorised Celebrant does a lot more than simply stand at the front and read a script (well, a little more).
They take care of the legal side of the marriage, and also bring experience in prepping and running wedding ceremonies.
What are the benefits of having a friend or family member lead your ceremony?
This is where things get a bit awesome.
Your friend or family member knows you. Not the version of you that appears in flat text on your wedding questionnaire that you wrote during a lunch break. The actual you.
Your bestie knows the drunken stories at 3am. Your dad knows the embarrassing childhood stuff, including your teddy (that you probably named Teddy). Your sister knows what you were like before you met your partner - the good, bad and flirtatious.
And that personal backlog of info can make a HUGE difference to your ceremony. As the founder of My Celebrant Buddy, I've seen it happen hundreds of times. The difference between a good ceremony and a great ceremony is those personal touches..
What are the disadvantages of having a friend lead your wedding ceremony?
There's one important thing to consider.
Once you've asked them to lead the ceremony, they're no longer just turning up, having a tequilla shot and enjoying themselves (well, they could do that after the ceremony).
They have a big responsibility.
They have to prepare, learn what they're saying, understand where everyone needs to be and potentially rehearse.
Some people absolutely love that responsibility. They'll want to do the best possible job because they love you. Others will quietly stress about it late at night.
So, should you hire a Celebrant or have a friend officiate?
There are really three options.
| Option | Who leads the ceremony? | Who handles the legal requirements? |
|---|---|---|
| Traditional Celebrant | Professional Celebrant | Professional Celebrant |
| Friend or family member | Friend or family member | Authorised Celebrant required |
| Co-Pilot Ceremony | Friend or family member leads most of it | Authorised marriage Celebrant |
What is a Co-Pilot Ceremony?
A Co-Pilot Ceremony allows the person you know and love to lead the personal and memorable parts of your wedding ceremony while an authorised registered Celebrant - such as myself - handles the legal requirements.
In other words:
Your registered Celebrant handles the legalities.
How does a Co-Pilot Ceremony work?
You choose your person
Your best friend, dad, mum, sister, brother, uncle or whoever you actually want standing at the front.
They prepare for the role
Your chosen person gets structured lessons, ceremony guidance, templates and support so they're not left trying to work it all out themselves.
The legal side is handled
An authorised marriage Celebrant takes care of the legal requirements and documentation required for your marriage.
What can your friend or family member do during the ceremony?
What does the authorised Celebrant do?
Is a Co-Pilot Ceremony legal in Australia?
Yes. A Co-Pilot Ceremony can result in a legally valid Australian marriage when all legal requirements are met and an authorised marriage Celebrant performs the functions required under Australian law.
Your friend isn't pretending to be the legal Celebrant. They're taking on the ceremonial role while the authorised Celebrant takes care of the legal requirements. And they have to let everybody at the ceremony know that from the outset.
What does My Celebrant Buddy provide?
My Celebrant Buddy is designed specifically for couples who want someone they know and love to lead their wedding ceremony.
Your chosen person gets the opportunity to be the face and voice - the personality, if you will - of your ceremony, while an authorised Celebrant takes care of the legal side.
But they're not simply handed a microphone and told:
Nup, they're given structured yet fun lessons, ceremony guidance, templates, scripting help and ongoing support. Everything they need to build the ceremony from start to finish, while still complying with the legal requirements.
Who is a Co-Pilot Ceremony good for?
Best mate
The person who has known you forever and knows all the tales that should NEVER make it into the ceremony.
Family
A very popular choice. Dad, Mum, sister, brother, uncle or another family member who knows you better than a stranger ever could. Bring the tissues - you'll need them.
Someone special
Anyone you genuinely want standing at the front of your ceremony, with professional support behind them. It can be your neighbour, your teacher. I've seen jujitsu teachers do it.
Which option is right for you?
Choose a professional Celebrant if...
You want someone experienced to take responsibility for the whole ceremony and don't want to worry about preparing someone else.
Choose a friend if...
Having someone you love at the front is incredibly important to you, and you're prepared for them to take on the responsibility.
Choose a Co-Pilot if...
You want your friend or family member to lead the ceremony, while an authorised Celebrant takes care of the legal side.
What should you consider before choosing?
Who do you really want standing at the front?
Is there someone you've already imagined doing it? If the answer is immediately "Yep. It's got to be Dad", that's worth listening to.
Are they genuinely happy to do it?
Don't assume. Ask them. They might absolutely love the idea, or they might secretly be wondering what they've agreed to.
How much responsibility do you want?
If you want someone else to manage everything, a professional Celebrant may be easiest. If you want your person involved, a Co-Pilot Ceremony can give you both.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can my best friend marry me in Australia?
Your best friend can lead much of your wedding ceremony, but they cannot legally solemnise your marriage unless they are an authorised marriage Celebrant or another person legally authorised to solemnise marriages in Australia.
Can my dad officiate my wedding in Australia?
Yes, your dad can lead the personal and ceremonial parts of your wedding, but an authorised marriage Celebrant needs to handle the legal requirements if you want the ceremony to legally marry you.
Does the Celebrant have to perform the entire ceremony?
No. A Co-Pilot Ceremony allows your chosen friend or family member to deliver most of the ceremony while an authorised Celebrant performs the legal functions required under Australian marriage law.
Is a Co-Pilot Ceremony legally valid?
Yes, provided the legal requirements are met and an authorised marriage Celebrant performs the functions required by Australian law.
Does my friend need to become a Celebrant?
No. That's one of the main reasons the Co-Pilot model exists. Your chosen person can lead the ceremonial parts without becoming a registered marriage Celebrant.
Does my friend need training?
They don't need to become a qualified Celebrant, but they do need to be properly prepared for the role. My Celebrant Buddy provides online lessons, templates and support to help your chosen person prepare and deliver the ceremony confidently.
Who handles the marriage paperwork?
The authorised marriage Celebrant handles the legal requirements and marriage paperwork.
Can a friend tell our story and lead our vows?
Yes. Your chosen person can lead many of the personal parts of the ceremony, including your story, readings, ring exchange and personal vows, while the authorised Celebrant handles the legal requirements.
Is a Co-Pilot Ceremony available across Australia?
Yes. My Celebrant Buddy offers Co-Pilot Ceremony options in Victoria and works with authorised Celebrants in other parts of Australia.
How much does a Co-Pilot Ceremony cost?
The cost depends on which Co-Pilot option you choose and when the legal requirements are completed. See the current My Celebrant Buddy options and pricing for the latest information.
You don't have to choose between your person and a professional Celebrant.
Your best mate can tell the stories. Your dad can make the jokes. Your sister can lead the ceremony. And an authorised Celebrant can take care of the legal side.
Your wedding. Your person. Your ceremony.
See How a Co-Pilot Ceremony Works